Watch the Instagram post that inspired this blog.
You make breakfast, sit down, and decide to eat without your phone. A minute later, you feel a little uncomfortable. Maybe even a pang of sadness. Your hand reaches for your phone before you’ve really thought about it.
That feeling is worth getting curious about. Maybe you are sad, and the quiet has given you room to notice it. But maybe part of the discomfort is that nothing especially interesting is happening right now.
And that’s okay. Neutral is not bad.
We’re so used to filling small gaps in the day that an ordinary moment can start to feel like something is missing. We watch something while we eat, listen to something while we get ready, scroll while we wait in line. None of those things are wrong. But when we’re accustomed to constant input, a few quiet minutes might feel strangely empty.
That doesn’t mean you have to turn every quiet breakfast into a mindfulness exercise. And it doesn’t mean you should dismiss sadness when it shows up. Sadness and boredom can coexist. You can feel lonely and be reaching for your phone out of habit.
The invitation is just to pause before deciding what the discomfort means. You might ask yourself: Am I feeling sad? Am I craving stimulation? Is this simply a moment that isn’t asking much of me?
If you’re sad, you can care for that feeling. If you want to watch a video while you eat, you can choose to do that, too. But you may also find that nothing needs fixing.Some moments aren’t exciting or painful or meaningful. They’re just ordinary. You’re eating breakfast. The room is quiet. For a few minutes, life feels neutral.
Neutral doesn’t have to be a feeling you escape. It can be a place you’re allowed to be.
About the author: Chelsea Doswell is an Associate Professional Clinical Counselor providing online therapy to clients in California. Learn more about Chelsea and her approach to therapy.
